Sick of People and Their "All About Me" Attitudes

I love the fact that we are moving on Tuesday, and yet hardly anything has been packed. What has been packed, is my doing, without that, we would have literally nothing done.

Matthew has pushed me to the edge tonight, and everything he has done all week has finally made me snap with his selfishness and inconsideration of others. Yesterday he tells me that we will spend the day packing and getting things ready for the move. When all of a sudden he decides he is going to go out and have a few drinks with the guys. That's fine, until I need to be the one to drive him there. Of course he has to be there in the hour it's down pouring the hardest. So like the nice wife that I am, I go into the nasty weather and drop him off. Thinking he would only be there for a few hours, I go ahead and box up the guest bedroom on my own. I get a text from him later on that he is drunk and doesn't know where he is at. I ask him if he was still at the bar or if he walked to a different one. Nope, turns out he went to a friends house. I tell him since he doesn't know where he is, he can just crash there. That's not good for him, he bugs me at 10:30 to pick him up and join him at the big fire he and the guys made. (great, a bunch of drunk sailors playing with big fire) I argue with him for a little over text, but in the end, I do want him to know, that I will go get him from any situation, regardless where he is, because I love him and want him safe. Doesn't make me any less angry with him though. So after I get the address I googlemap it, and find that it is 45 min away in the middle of no where! I am now more angry with him for traveling to far, without telling me, and now I have to go pick his dumb drunk ass up. On my way there, it's not only dark and on curvy roads, but it's really foggy and I can't see a damn thing. Once I finally got there, I told him to get into the car. He wanted to stay, but I was in no mood to be around a bunch of drunk dumb fucks. Once he got into the car, he laid the seat down and passed out. Smelling up the car with the scent of alcohol. Finally we got back home, I marched up stairs, walked into the master bedroom, and right before I slammed the door in his face I told him to sleep on the couch! I can't believe him! He was out for 9 hours drinking! He wasted the whole day and now tomorrow with being hung over. He has been useless ever since he qualified from prototype. He takes 3 hour naps in the middle of the day, he watches movies and eats whatever I put in front of him. He whines when he wants something, and complains and makes me feel guilty if I don't do it. Then after all I do, I have to do more! I am so over it! I am so angry so livid so done!!!

Why can't men be a little bit more aware of their surroundings? More courteous of those around them? Just for once think of someone else besides themselves. It's horrible when you have to tell him to call his own mother!!

Speaking of mothers, mine is on my shit list too! She never responds, she will be out of contact for days. For fucks sake I could be hurt, and she would never know. She could be hurt and I would never know. This whole idea of hers to move to Belize was the dumbest thing I have ever heard! She is just as selfish and inconsiderate as my husband is! How dare a mother take off and leave her children to fend on their own after losing their father! Ugh, why is the world becoming so self-centered and all about themselves? It's not going to get us anywhere good!

I am over everything and everyone right now. Some of my friends here are driving my crazy! Always wanting to hang out, and having some reason to get attention. I hate trying to make my personality split into 4 or 5 different emotions. Feeling sorry for someone, happy for another, angry and someone else and excited for others. I am over it. Until I move, I am staying in this house, no one is to come over, and I am not leaving unless i really want to! I am so sick of people and their "all about me" attitudes!

Of course not everyone is like this. Caitlyn listened to my rant all day today, and for that I thank her! I am sure I am much more moody because it is late and I am tired and I had a long full day of anger. So I am going to call it a night. Until next time...

~ Live, Laugh, Love